"I've been thinking about it for a few years," Buffington said. "What got me started thinking about it was my kids, they're getting older. (Now 10, nine and six, two boys and a girl.) I'd already made the decision that I did not want to coach them in high school and if I stayed until they got to high school, I'd be losing all that time with them.

"Whereas if I got out now, I'd be there more for my kids in youth sports. That's valuable time I don't want to miss, I don't want to look back and have those regrets."

No regrets ... which doesn't mean this decision was an easy one.

"I genuinely appreciate the opportunity Helias has given me and the support they've given me through the years," Buffington said. "Helias will always hold a very special place in my heart.

"I cannot say thank you enough to my immediate and extended families, the faculty, the staff, the coaches, the past and current administrations, and supportive families that have helped us succeed along the way. I'm proud of everything we've done as a staff and a program the last 10 years.

"I have no ill feelings and I have zero doubts with my decision. I'm 100 percent at peace with it."

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JOSH BUFFINGTON IS ONLY 41, which is far too young to think he'll never coach again. Because it's what coaches do ... coach.

They can't help themselves.

In all, Buffington's coached for 17 years, starting as head coach at his high school alma mater, New Bloomfield, in 2001-02. After serving as head assistant at Missouri Baptist for three years, his father, Hall of Famer Don Buffington, retired from School of the Osage in 2005, and Josh took over and directed the Indians for three years.

He came to Helias in 2008 to replace another Hall of Famer, Jerry Buescher. Buffington produced seven All-State players and went 195-85 with the Crusaders, and he's 240-144 overall.

"I'm not ruling anything out in the future," he said. "I was taught, and I stand by this, that when one door closes, another one always opens. I'll always keep opportunities and options alive, but for right now, this is the best decision for myself, my wife (Jami) and my family.

"And I must say this: I've got the best coach's wife in the country. People don't understand how much head coach's wives go through, they go through the same stresses and the pains and the down times as the head coach does.

"We've had far many more ups than downs. But in the last two or three years, the negatives have started outweighing the positives for me to continue on."

That brings us to Reason No. 2 for this announcement. Not necessarily that it happened, but why it happened now.

"The game has definitely changed," Buffington said. "It's not only changed through a strategic standpoint and from a development standpoint on the court, it's changed off the court."

In his resignation letter to Helias, Buffington wrote:

I see the trend of Youth Sports and High School Sports going in a direction that I don't support. I was coached and taught to show tough love, intensity, and no politics. I have zero tolerance for laziness, selfishness and entitlement.

In my strong opinion, in this era of parenting styles, leadership styles, guilty until proven innocent philosophies, and social media addictions…it will continue to be a grinding task to coach and mentor with a certain style.

Buffington continued during our conversation.

"With my style of coaching," he said, "some people aren't receptive to it. The vast majority of our parents and players were receptive, and I respect them for it --- they know it's a super-tough world and a super-competitive world.

"Nothing is given, no one is entitled to anything. They're going to have to earn it, or they won't have success. Whether people agree or disagree with me, I'm cut from the old school cloth and I'm proud of that."

If the doors at the Old School haven't slammed shut --- yet --- they're getting close. Recently, it appears to have cost Buffington's good friend and high school teammate, Tony Phillips, his job as girls basketball coach at Southern Boone.

"That," Buffington said, "was a sad deal."

It reminds us of a saying --- not an old saying, as most are, but a new one.

Kids haven't changed, parents have.

"It's very true. And it's sad. And at times, it disgusts me," Buffington said. "I think what we all need to do as parents --- and we've all been guilty of it, at some point --- is we have to make a change. The ones who truly get it understand they're hindering their child, the program, or the team.

"I've had some great parents and supporters along the way, and I cannot thank them enough. They know who they are. What's sad is the small percentage of the other people that every coach has to deal with, and how they communicate what they think the problems are, indirectly or even anonymously.

"They are the ones moving forward that have to live with their assumptions and selfishness, not us as coaches."

Just like his supporters, Buffington knows who they are, too. Proud of yourselves?

"It's an accelerated trend that's become worse," Buffington continued. "I've not wanted to coach the game bitter, and I'm afraid if I continue on, I could be coaching the game that way. That's not my personality and it's not who I am, I don't want this for myself or my players. I genuinely hope it changes and comes back to where it should be.

"But again, my decision is not based on this. At the same time, has it sped things up for me? There's a good possibility."

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WHILE BUFFINGTON IS CERTAINLY PROUD of all the wins, district titles and Final Fours, he's most proud of the program he's built --- he calls it in "the top five to 10 in the state" --- and the fact so many alumni are integral parts of the program.

"It's taken a lot of work and people coming together, supporters and alumni, to get it done," he said. "And I really respect everybody who helped us get that done. If I thanked everybody right now, it would add another three pages to your story."

The search for his replacement will begin immediately, but Buffington has his choice --- top assistant Joe Rothweiler.

"I strongly recommend him getting this job," Buffington said. "We've had a bond and a connection for a long time, and there's not a better guy to take over than Joe Rothweiler."

What will Buffington miss the most?

"The competition," he said. "I'm not going to miss the passion, because the passion is going to stay with me. I'll find other ways to compete, I promise you that, but it's still going to be hard to match competing on a Tuesday or Friday night at Rackers Fieldhouse."

Buffington never taught at Helias, and he will continue his full-time job with Midwest Block.

"They've been awesome to me, they've been very flexible with my hours and they're big supporters of Helias," he said.

You should never question what Josh Buffington has given to Helias the past 10 years --- everything he's got.

"In 17 years," he said, "I've coached so hard, it drains you mentally, it drains you physically. I may be comparable to someone who's coached for 30 years, but I would never change the intensity and the passion.

"I know I've made a lot of mistakes as a coach, but I know I made them because of my intensity and my passion. We all make mistakes, but I think I've done a good job of learning from them and moving forward."

Buffington met with his team Wednesday morning.

"As I've gotten older," he said, "I've probably gotten a little more emotional. I think I held it together pretty well, but I had to keep it as short as possible so I could get through it.

"There was a mix of emotions --- I'm sure some of (the players) are sad, some of them are upset, and I think everyone was surprised. I hope they at least understand that this is a decision I'm making as a father and a husband."

If they don't understand now, they will at some point.

"In 17 years of coaching," Buffington concluded, "I've had so much fun, it's been my passion. But my family is more of a passion than coaching high school basketball is. I'm looking forward to being on the sidelines or in the dugout with my kids, motivating their friends, having some fun and teaching them how to play the game the right way."

In other words, foot stomping is coming soon to a gym near you.

Thanks for everything, coach. You will be missed.

In a surprise move to most,

Buffington resigns from Helias

Helias head coach Josh Buffington presents junior Landon Harrison with a basketball after Harrison scored his 1,000th career point during a game with Hickman at Rackers Fieldhouse on Feb. 10, 2017.

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